Well, it looks like the unicorn effort is needed on another front — this time in Michigan. The latest, from Left Action:
Michigan Republican Pete Hoekstra, a former Congressman and current candidate for the U.S. Senate, has proposed setting up a national birther office to vet presidential candidates. In spite of the fact that President Obama’s birth in Hawaii has been proven again and again, Hoekstra believes that America actually needs to do more – and spend your tax dollars on birtherism:
“Before Donald Trump re-ignited the “birther” controversy, U.S. Senate candidate Pete Hoekstra told a Michigan tea party gathering earlier this month that John McCain failed to press the issue properly in the 2008 campaign. Hoekstra, responding to a question about President Barack Obama’s birth certificate, said he believes the country should establish a national office that would vet and confirm a candidate’s ability to run for the presidency. (source: Pete Hoekstra: Establish national ‘birther’ office for presidential candidates).”
Here we go again. Yet another Republican stoking the fires of birtherism. And trying to establish America’s first ever government entity dedicated to conspiracy nonsense.
But what about Mitt Romney? What about the persistent rumors that Mitt Romney is in fact, a unicorn? There has never been a conclusive DNA test proving that Mitt Romney is not a unicorn. We have never seen him without his hair — hair that could be covering up a horn.
We need Pete Hoekstra to investigate. We need him to set up an office dedicated to establishing whether or not presidential candidates are in fact unicorns. Candidates need to have their DNA compared to the DNA of actual unicorns, or at least have their heads shaved to determine whether they have horns.
Please join us in asking Pete Hoekstra to set up a national department of unicornism investigation. Please send him a message. Or a few. Or a few hundred. Because if we’re going to be investigating cockamamie conspiracy theories at the Federal level, unicorn-gate needs to be a part of that.
The truth is out there. And it might well have a horn.